It’s very cold outdoors. I would not know it as I am sealed indoors. Like a fresh tetrapack of almond milk. I try to maintain my glossy sealed facade by rolling my face into oblivion for as many minutes as possible each night with a medieval torture device replete with rubbery prongs on either ends. They spin on wheels that press and knead my face as I roll my jowls and cheeks over my well oiled face. The outside world may be caving in, but inside my room I exert complete control over my jawline.
